At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
