Non-Jews are for practice
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
