i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
