We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
