Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
