And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize