And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
