Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
