Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
