whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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