okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
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