Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize