so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
