Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize