I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize