I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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