our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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