That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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