fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
