there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
