i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
