dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
