I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
