How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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