me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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