they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
