Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
the night ended with taco bell and tears
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
