i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
