I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
