I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize
