Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
