is your mom at the bar?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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