Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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