OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
