Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Is it penis luge time yet?
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
