I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
