did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
