that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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