I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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