I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
