Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
