Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
