; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
