I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize