i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
