moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
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