But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Randomize
