Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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