After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Randomize
