obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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