Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Randomize
