Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
